heart palpitating impatience
The thing with travelling is it sometimes brings about this level of reflection in your life that makes you quite contemplative. At least for me this is the case. I often find although I am taking in my surroundings while I am away, I tend to appreciate them more when I leave them.
I worked late last night, many great projects on the go but it left me feeling pretty exhausted. Needless to say in my dry eyed, sleepy haze, the only place I could imagine being was somewhere new, comfortable yes, but new. It would seem rather odd for some people to try to understand why I would want a new place to be rather than the comforts of home when I am feeling exhausted but I looked at it completely differently.
For the last while, I have been working really hard at doing all the things that I LOVE the most. Chasing my dreams shall we say ( i know cliche). In doing so, I am physically moving pretty quickly and finding myself with this inner urge to jump up and down, go for a run- i really don't know what the heck to call it except that it is this heart palpitating desire to DO! Make change, seek adventure, bulldoze my home, by a farm. Crazy I know! But its also the best feeling in the whole entire world. Its like the fishing line was cast a long time ago and I can finally feel the fish tugging. The only real question that I think is causing the jump out of my skin feeling is, where the heck does that big fish want to take me?
In thinking about all of these seemingly complex states of mind ( its really not that deep I promise) I do always find myself landing on our home. It seems to be this space that nags and nags and nags for change. We wish wash our way through decisions on what to do and ultimately nothing gets done.
I fell in love with this home feature. It spoke to my chaos in a way that it told it to completely bugger off. Seek simplicity Meg. Stop overthinking it. Make a decision, make it really great and then find the time to live in it and love it. I know exactly what we want in our home and this irrational withholding is making my skin crawl. It's time my friends, time to land that big fish and make the change that is burning a hole in my gut.
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